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(light music)

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(bright music)

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(light orchestral music)
(people murmuring)

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(speaking in Hebrew)

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(phone ringing)

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(person vocalizing)

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♪ This is a fast, fast ♪

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YaelFor years I've been documenting us

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in attempt to say what the eye can't see,

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to express the feelings that can't be expressed in words.

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Who are you? Why does that question need to be asked?

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There are those who get up in the morning

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and don't ask questions.

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Ever since I've known myself,

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I've woken up with this question, who am I?

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How can one explain

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when each day reality seems a bit different?

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Anyway, these are the factors I remember.

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♪ This is a far, far ♪

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YaelThis is our perfect family house in Jaffa.

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This is the view from the room my parents have kept for me,

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even though I haven't lived in Israel for 15 years.

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This is our mother Eti, undoubtedly a specimen

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of non-conformist Israeli culture.

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This is our father Yossi, a handsome, dreamy pied-piper

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who believes we're a family of nobility,

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destined for greatness.

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This is our sister Sigal who's like a second mom to us.

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Actually, she taught us everything.

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This is Oded, a beloved brother-in-law

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and the only sane person around.

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And this is you, Eilon, the pride of the family,

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assertive manager, new father and loving husband.

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You recently started managing mom's chain of kindergartens.

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I still don't know how you adapted to that role.

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This is Miki, your beautiful wife

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who left Jean Paul Gautier's set

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and gave birth to Eddy.

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And this is me, your sister Yael.

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I know I don't look like one, but I'm a model

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and even quite a successful one.

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(speaking in Hebrew)

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(light music box music)

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(speaking in Hebrew)

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YaelYou and I were always alike.

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Mom says we are twin souls,

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that we are connected in a way we'll never understand.

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We are both tall and skinny with a dreamy look in our eyes

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and ever dreamier thoughts.

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People who don't know us think we're a couple

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and those who know us think we're too close

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for a brother and sister.

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You went to art school and passed all your exams,

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while I left school at 15 and became a model.

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When you were in the army,

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I was in Japan and had a nervous breakdown.

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Since then, I've been obsessed

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with filming everything in sight.

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We both got married.

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I married your friend and you married mine.

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Then I got divorced.

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You became a father

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and I came to the firm conclusion

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that relationship kill love.

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But we are always together

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like a couple of patches on an old coat.

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(Yael laughing)

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So here I am, stop by on my way from Tokyo to Paris,

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completely detached from everything that's going on.

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New Year's Eve.

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(fireworks booming)
Happy New Year.

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That evening, Miki stayed home with little Eddy.

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You and I went out.

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I was due to fly to New York for a shoot the next day

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and you are going back to the kids

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who wait for you every morning.

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You said you'd finally grown up.

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You are a father with responsibilities now

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and it's a thrill.

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(heart pounding)

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You dropped me off at home.

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Although you were in a hurry to get home,

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you waited until I'd opened the front door, blown you a kiss

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and closed the door behind me.

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One more breath, one gesture less

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and our lives would be so much different.

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(crowd cheering)
(upbeat music)

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It wasn't your fault.

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You drove carefully and had your seatbelt on.

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Four drunk teenagers didn't stop at the stop sign

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and you were hit by the speeding car.

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(tires squealing)
(car crashing)

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(sirens buzzing)
(radio muttering)

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(breath swooshing)

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YaelYour car crashed into a pillar causing head injury.

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At 5:00 AM with no prior notice,

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you were taken in for emergency brain surgery

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in attempt to save your life

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(device beeping)

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YaelThe day your condition deteriorated,

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the surgeon called me to look at x-rays of your brain.

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Pieces of your skull bones

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are cutting into your personality.

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Which part of you are we ready to give up in your name?

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Your humor? Your passion?

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Your love?

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YaelThe moment I was so expecting,

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that I was so afraid of,

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was the moment when you'd open your eyes

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and not know who I am.

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Or even worse, I wouldn't know who you are.

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Miki was afraid you wouldn't recognize her.

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Daniel, that you would no longer love electronic music.

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Each person knew a different Eilon.

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At the kindergarten, kids are waiting

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for their devoted teacher.

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Friends talk of what a great artist you were.

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Mom only wants you to live.

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She doesn't care who or what you'll be.

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Dad has decided he's connected to your soul.

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We've been sitting around you for a month now,

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waiting for you to wake up.

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YaelYou woke up tied to your bed at the hospital.

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You didn't remember the accident or your previous life.

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You thought you were in a lunatic asylum.

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All you wanted was to escape, to be free.

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You tried to explain it to us,

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but all that came out was fragmented syllables

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and cries of anguish and pain.

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When you realize it was of no use, you stopped eating,

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protest of insult and treason screamed out of your eyes.

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You were wild with fury. There was no way to calm you.

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The doctors recommended putting you back to sleep.

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Against their advice, Mom and Dad are taking you home.

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(speaking in Hebrew)

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(gentle pensive music)

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(gentle pensive music continues)

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(Eti murmuring)

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(harmonica blaring)

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(harmonica blaring)

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YaelI'm going home to New York

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three weeks later than planned.

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I feel as if I'm sending only my body.

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My heart is with you alongside with the rest of the family,

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but I'm here alone,

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surprised to discover I have a partner who's oblivious

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to my emotional upheaval.

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I'm beginning to understand the torment of a twin soul.

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I physically feel your pain inside me

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as if I'd been sitting there with you in the car

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and that other car, it hit me too.

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I can't talk, can't explain to anyone how I feel.

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I'm wordless. Can't take it.

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- Look,

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(phone ringing)

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(phone ringing)

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Remember the tape you sent me when I was in Japan?

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You were in the army and I was in Tokyo.

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A 17-year-old model in the middle of a nervous breakdown,

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locked in my room, afraid to go out.

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I was scared to death and couldn't stop crying.

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That tape kept me sane for months.

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As I listened to you talking from your army pit in the Golan

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and share the difficulties with you, I felt protected

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and found solace and peace in your voice

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explaining there is no logic,

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there are only wishes and miracles and music,

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which is like bandaid for bleeding hearts.

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That was the first note

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of a deep relationship across the world.

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It's been eight years

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and now you're calling me from another pit.

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It's time to come home for as long as possible

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to our private place, which needs to heal.

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(gentle pensive music)

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(singing in Hebrew)

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YaelThe summer filled everything with life's joy.

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Tel Aviv.

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Everything is happening here and now

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and it's all so tangible.

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We are busy with physical elementary things.

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Eddy's learning to crawl

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and you are learning everything in you.

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I remember Yael, the child I left years ago

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before the rat race began, when living was simple.

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We are at point zero, when everything is permitted,

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including doing nothing at all.

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Just enjoying the sun by the sea,

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being together and not being alone.

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(waves murmuring)

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Eilon Okay, you ready?

220
00:17:53.791 -- 00:17:55.290
-Yes.
-Let's go, Yael.

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We go to Hawaii.

222
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Good, Yael, very good.

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(fireworks booming)

224
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YaelBut of all times,

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when Miki and you go home to what was once the safest,

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most familiar place, you begin to have moments

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of alienation, loneliness and pain.

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Lots of pain.

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You feel like someone else, not the Eilon you remember.

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(waves murmuring)

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233
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(Eilon growling)

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235
00:19:20.589 -- 00:19:23.339
(Eilon growling)

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YaelOn September 9th, 1999,

237
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we celebrated your 30th birthday,

238
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your first birthday since the accident.

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Everyone was there, wanted to celebrate with you.

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Amid all the loving faces, your feeling of alienation grew.

241
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242
00:20:04.912 -- 00:20:07.249
YaelMom and Dad bought you a piano.

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00:20:07.249 -- 00:20:11.972

244
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(light piano music)

245
00:20:13.807 -- 00:20:18.307


246
00:20:34.129 -- 00:20:38.046
(light piano music continues)

247
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YaelEver since I remember myself,

248
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I felt like a stranger.

249
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Like I don't belong, can't belong.

250
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At the age of 10, I knew I'd missed the boat,

251
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that my life was a failure

252
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and no way would I find a husband.

253
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When I got my first cover photo at the age of 15,

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I didn't let myself get too excited.

255
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When I got an offer to work abroad at 17,

256
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I simply packed and left.

257
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Dad thought it was good to see the word.

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What appealed to me was not a huge sum of money

259
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they were paying before I even knew

260
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how to convert foreign currency,

261
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nor was it being on a runway amid the blinding flashes

262
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alongside Naomi Campbell, Linda, or whoever.

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What I was really seeking was to cut away.

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The first years in New York were filled with panic attacks.

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I could have gone home and got help,

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but I was afraid that I would remain handicapped forever.

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While I travel the world,

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I feel myself talking to the camera.

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Nobody really knew me.

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On the outside, I was strong and beautiful,

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and on the inside I was seeking a way to cry out.

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(Eilon screaming)

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-Say you will!

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(vehicle swooshing)

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YaelThe family was always

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00:21:59.130 -- 00:22:00.960
the most important thing for you.

279
00:22:00.960 -- 00:22:03.330
The source of pride and strength.

280
00:22:03.330 -- 00:22:05.790
Your courageous attempt to preserve that framework

281
00:22:05.790 -- 00:22:07.080
was a constant challenge

282
00:22:07.080 -- 00:22:09.930
in the face of your outbreaks of anger and hate

283
00:22:09.930 -- 00:22:12.843
that strained you and left you all scarred and hurting.

284
00:22:14.280 -- 00:22:17.073
Two years later, you and Miki divorced.

285
00:22:18.844 -- 00:22:23.261


286
00:22:49.160 -- 00:22:53.577


287
00:22:55.861 -- 00:23:00.111


288
00:23:13.825 -- 00:23:18.242


289
00:23:30.197 -- 00:23:32.323


290
00:23:32.323 -- 00:23:36.740


291
00:23:44.310 -- 00:23:47.082


292
00:23:47.082 -- 00:23:51.582


293
00:24:10.421 -- 00:24:14.838


294
00:24:24.008 -- 00:24:27.170
(gentle music box music)

295
00:24:27.170 -- 00:24:28.920
YaelIn the eyes of my New York friends,

296
00:24:28.920 -- 00:24:30.620
Eddy and I are the perfect couple.

297
00:24:32.010 -- 00:24:34.500
He photographed me for his exhibition five years ago

298
00:24:34.500 -- 00:24:35.790
and since then I've been part

299
00:24:35.790 -- 00:24:37.803
of his cosmic plan to conquer the world.

300
00:24:39.660 -- 00:24:41.340
He takes photographs and I model.

301
00:24:41.340 -- 00:24:43.560
He paints and I document.

302
00:24:43.560 -- 00:24:46.320
We communicate in a language only we can understand,

303
00:24:46.320 -- 00:24:48.183
something between English and French.

304
00:24:49.380 -- 00:24:51.450
Correspondingly dressed, our holidays wander

305
00:24:51.450 -- 00:24:53.430
from one exhibition to another,

306
00:24:53.430 -- 00:24:55.830
and the collection of junk decorating our apartment

307
00:24:55.830 -- 00:24:59.010
could be placed in the museum alongside with the two of us.

308
00:24:59.010 -- 00:25:00.780
No need to say that two kids and a dog

309
00:25:00.780 -- 00:25:02.850
would ruin the composition.

310
00:25:02.850 -- 00:25:04.320
Our love is as big as this wall

311
00:25:04.320 -- 00:25:05.913
that Eddy had dedicated to me.

312
00:25:07.460 -- 00:25:09.030
-Will you marry me?

313
00:25:09.030 -- 00:25:10.620
YaelBut I'm unable to picture myself

314
00:25:10.620 -- 00:25:11.820
on that great wall.

315
00:25:11.820 -- 00:25:13.770
All I can see is my alienated face

316
00:25:13.770 -- 00:25:15.603
that looks more detached than ever.

317
00:25:18.780 -- 00:25:23.070
There's no point pretending. It only makes things worse.

318
00:25:23.070 -- 00:25:25.050
I'm losing touch with my life in New York

319
00:25:25.050 -- 00:25:26.880
and memories of summer in Tel Aviv

320
00:25:26.880 -- 00:25:29.130
give me new lease on life.

321
00:25:29.130 -- 00:25:32.643
Like you, I plunge into words without words.

322
00:25:35.164 -- 00:25:38.331
(singing in Hebrew)

323
00:25:49.357 -- 00:25:53.774


324
00:26:22.914 -- 00:26:27.331


325
00:26:55.185 -- 00:26:57.360
YaelYou went to live on your own.

326
00:26:57.360 -- 00:27:00.000
Mom and Dad suggested you move in with them,

327
00:27:00.000 -- 00:27:01.530
but you wanted to prove to yourself

328
00:27:01.530 -- 00:27:03.960
and to everyone that you could deal with everything,

329
00:27:03.960 -- 00:27:07.143
despite the accident and maybe even because of it.

330
00:27:12.480 -- 00:27:15.690
I sent you a video I'd filmed throughout the years

331
00:27:15.690 -- 00:27:18.160
hoping it would help you find the answers.

332
00:27:20.963 -- 00:27:25.380


333
00:27:27.741 -- 00:27:30.608

334
00:27:30.608 -- 00:27:33.358
(Eilon chuckles)

335
00:27:34.230 -- 00:27:38.647


336
00:27:52.387 -- 00:27:56.804


337
00:28:15.323 -- 00:28:19.740


338
00:28:41.266 -- 00:28:45.683


339
00:29:02.463 -- 00:29:06.796


340
00:29:25.915 -- 00:29:30.332


341
00:29:47.118 -- 00:29:49.567
(upbeat music)

342
00:29:49.567 -- 00:29:53.984


343
00:30:03.444 -- 00:30:07.861


344
00:30:27.854 -- 00:30:31.771
(person singing indistinctly)

345
00:30:38.280 -- 00:30:40.290
YaelSomehow, we all talked in the hospital

346
00:30:40.290 -- 00:30:41.730
about the art school days

347
00:30:41.730 -- 00:30:43.560
and what a wonderful painter you were

348
00:30:43.560 -- 00:30:45.360
and might still be when you woke up.

349
00:30:46.290 -- 00:30:48.957
It was just a thought to comfort us, when you lay there

350
00:30:48.957 -- 00:30:51.453
and we were trying to grasp on what had happened.

351
00:30:52.890 -- 00:30:55.110
And now, two years later,

352
00:30:55.110 -- 00:30:57.783
you are painting again and it's amazing.

353
00:30:58.617 -- 00:31:02.450
(person singing indistinctly)

354
00:31:09.928 -- 00:31:14.345


355
00:31:33.530 -- 00:31:37.947


356
00:32:06.019 -- 00:32:10.436


357
00:32:23.604 -- 00:32:28.021


358
00:32:57.174 -- 00:33:01.591


359
00:33:30.053 -- 00:33:34.470


360
00:33:35.826 -- 00:33:38.100
(dark piano music)

361
00:33:38.100 -- 00:33:38.970
YaelTime is passing

362
00:33:38.970 -- 00:33:41.583
and your quick rehabilitation surprises us all.

363
00:33:43.200 -- 00:33:46.023
Amid all this progress, Miki found somebody new,

364
00:33:46.860 -- 00:33:48.543
somebody who was once a friend.

365
00:33:50.610 -- 00:33:52.740
You had a renewed sense of loss

366
00:33:52.740 -- 00:33:55.023
and the notion that life is not always fair.

367
00:33:56.640 -- 00:33:59.553
I believe you when you tell me you can't deal with things.

368
00:34:01.980 -- 00:34:05.073
Through your paintings, you express pain and fears,

369
00:34:06.030 -- 00:34:09.273
self-portraits with bleeding hearts and an wounded body.

370
00:34:10.230 -- 00:34:15.230
And women, suffering women, wounded women, monstrous women.

371
00:34:17.640 -- 00:34:19.263
Your paintings are violent.

372
00:34:20.160 -- 00:34:21.963
Violent as you feel life can be.

373
00:34:22.950 -- 00:34:26.190
And only we can detect your cry from inside,

374
00:34:26.190 -- 00:34:28.800
your gentleness and innocence

375
00:34:28.800 -- 00:34:31.173
and your talent to create life on canvas,

376
00:34:32.490 -- 00:34:33.543
your own life.

377
00:34:38.700 -- 00:34:41.073
I'm also going through breakups and changes.

378
00:34:42.090 -- 00:34:44.940
I leave the home I shared with Eddy and go to live alone.

379
00:34:45.780 -- 00:34:47.793
You paint and I learn to edit.

380
00:34:49.380 -- 00:34:51.480
I delve into all those years that pass

381
00:34:51.480 -- 00:34:53.580
through the lens of my camera,

382
00:34:53.580 -- 00:34:55.530
seeking meaning and language in it all.

383
00:34:56.520 -- 00:35:00.390
The whole word of art and inspection opens up inside me.

384
00:35:00.390 -- 00:35:02.160
I get closer to myself.

385
00:35:02.160 -- 00:35:04.533
Don't live my life in the shadow of others.

386
00:35:05.970 -- 00:35:08.850
I call my first video art piece "Tokyo."

387
00:35:08.850 -- 00:35:12.930
I too chose to start my journey from a breaking point,

388
00:35:12.930 -- 00:35:13.890
my breaking point.

389
00:35:13.890 -- 00:35:18.393
Tokyo, Japan.

390
00:35:22.637 -- 00:35:24.033
Failed my mission.

391
00:35:26.980 -- 00:35:31.213
Come, come sit next to me.

392
00:35:42.139 -- 00:35:45.139
(light piano music)

393
00:35:54.663 -- 00:35:56.250
Yael VoiceoverAnother visit home

394
00:35:56.250 -- 00:35:59.070
and I'm surprised to discover that of all places,

395
00:35:59.070 -- 00:36:02.013
your private place seems to be the most peaceful and calm.

396
00:36:03.360 -- 00:36:05.340
When I look at your paintings, I believe

397
00:36:05.340 -- 00:36:08.283
that God had simply decided that you were to be a painter.

398
00:36:11.070 -- 00:36:13.920
You told me you wanted to come to New York with me,

399
00:36:13.920 -- 00:36:16.083
to go somewhere that is less personal.

400
00:36:17.550 -- 00:36:20.340
You'd paint and maybe we would both be the artists

401
00:36:20.340 -- 00:36:21.603
we always wanted to be.

402
00:36:23.987 -- 00:36:28.320


403
00:36:32.026 -- 00:36:36.443


404
00:36:40.957 -- 00:36:45.290


405
00:36:48.966 -- 00:36:50.300


406
00:36:50.300 -- 00:36:54.446


407
00:36:54.446 -- 00:36:57.661


408
00:36:57.661 -- 00:36:58.633


409
00:36:58.633 -- 00:37:02.966


410
00:37:04.054 -- 00:37:08.218


411
00:37:08.218 -- 00:37:12.192
(Oded speaking in foreign language and laughs)

412
00:37:12.192 -- 00:37:14.999


413
00:37:14.999 -- 00:37:17.490


414
00:37:17.490 -- 00:37:18.640


415
00:37:18.640 -- 00:37:21.694


416
00:37:21.694 -- 00:37:24.898


417
00:37:24.898 -- 00:37:27.398
(light music)

418
00:37:28.774 -- 00:37:32.024
(singing in Hebrew)

419
00:37:44.943 -- 00:37:49.666


420
00:37:49.666 -- 00:37:54.083


421
00:38:02.582 -- 00:38:06.915


422
00:38:14.214 -- 00:38:16.881
(yael knocking)

423
00:38:20.372 -- 00:38:22.722


424
00:38:22.722 -- 00:38:27.055


425
00:38:32.559 -- 00:38:35.392
(traffic humming)

426
00:38:36.259 -- 00:38:40.169


427
00:38:40.169 -- 00:38:41.807
(Eilon chuckling)

428
00:38:41.807 -- 00:38:46.224


429
00:39:02.049 -- 00:39:05.570


430
00:39:05.570 -- 00:39:09.987


431
00:39:27.131 -- 00:39:31.464


432
00:39:32.702 -- 00:39:37.119


433
00:39:44.458 -- 00:39:48.791


434
00:40:10.389 -- 00:40:14.806


435
00:40:40.582 -- 00:40:43.165
(somber music)

436
00:40:52.710 -- 00:40:55.170
YaelThe adventure in New York lasted for a month

437
00:40:55.170 -- 00:40:56.820
and then you went home to Israel.

438
00:40:58.020 -- 00:41:00.123
Being away from your son was impossible.

439
00:41:03.210 -- 00:41:04.530
In New York, you painted a lot

440
00:41:04.530 -- 00:41:06.603
and saw the artists living in that world.

441
00:41:10.170 -- 00:41:12.570
You plan to move to a big industrial space

442
00:41:12.570 -- 00:41:15.090
where you'll be able to fulfill yourself artistically

443
00:41:15.090 -- 00:41:16.680
and socialize again,

444
00:41:16.680 -- 00:41:18.990
after years of distancing yourself from the friends

445
00:41:18.990 -- 00:41:20.617
who knew the all day long.

446
00:41:21.791 -- 00:41:24.874
(somber piano music)

447
00:41:44.067 -- 00:41:47.984
(somber piano music continues)

448
00:42:09.487 -- 00:42:13.404
(somber piano music continues)

449
00:42:18.020 -- 00:42:21.020
(traffic swooshing)

450
00:42:23.884 -- 00:42:26.717
(engine rumbling)

451
00:42:27.679 -- 00:42:31.596
(somber piano music continues)

452
00:42:42.021 -- 00:42:46.438


453
00:43:15.678 -- 00:43:20.095


454
00:43:22.855 -- 00:43:26.022
(light playful music)

455
00:43:43.140 -- 00:43:45.180
YaelI didn't manage to live my life in New York,

456
00:43:45.180 -- 00:43:48.000
so I left everything there and came to Israel.

457
00:43:48.000 -- 00:43:49.140
We thought it's great.

458
00:43:49.140 -- 00:43:51.810
We wanted to do things together, wake the city up,

459
00:43:51.810 -- 00:43:54.630
set up a group, create, paint, maybe a gallery,

460
00:43:54.630 -- 00:43:58.500
a movie, music, a club, and we traveled around and filmed.

461
00:43:58.500 -- 00:44:00.870
But most of all, we laughed and danced and drank

462
00:44:00.870 -- 00:44:04.503
and talked nonstop and invented theories about life.

463
00:44:05.550 -- 00:44:07.860
We felt the energy up to our fingertips

464
00:44:07.860 -- 00:44:09.663
and fell in love until it hurt,

465
00:44:11.370 -- 00:44:14.370
but it was so clear that it was going too fast

466
00:44:14.370 -- 00:44:15.968
and that it would all explode.

467
00:44:15.968 -- 00:44:18.385
(Yael blows)

468
00:44:19.807 -- 00:44:24.224


469
00:44:52.829 -- 00:44:56.617


470
00:44:56.617 -- 00:44:59.880
-Welcome to Germany and enjoy your stay with us.

471
00:44:59.880 -- 00:45:00.900
Thank you very much.

472
00:45:00.900 -- 00:45:02.460
YaelTime passes and it doesn't show

473
00:45:02.460 -- 00:45:04.500
that you've been in an accident.

474
00:45:04.500 -- 00:45:06.687
Inside, you're still dealing with it though.

475
00:45:06.687 -- 00:45:09.393
And you need a great deal of discipline to handle it,

476
00:45:10.230 -- 00:45:12.880
to listen to people and trust those who care for you.

477
00:45:13.830 -- 00:45:15.570
If you rebel against it all,

478
00:45:15.570 -- 00:45:17.700
you could ruin everything in seconds

479
00:45:17.700 -- 00:45:20.819
for yourself and for everyone around you.

480
00:45:20.819 -- 00:45:25.236


481
00:45:54.179 -- 00:45:58.596


482
00:46:27.060 -- 00:46:30.060
YaelYou endanger the most precious things in your life.

483
00:46:30.060 -- 00:46:32.610
Everything you bravely earned throughout the years.

484
00:46:33.540 -- 00:46:35.280
I don't know if you realize it,

485
00:46:35.280 -- 00:46:37.533
at those times, you are unrecognizable.

486
00:46:38.610 -- 00:46:40.200
It's hard to admit,

487
00:46:40.200 -- 00:46:43.410
but at times we also feel we can't go on.

488
00:46:43.410 -- 00:46:44.658
Goddammit, Eilon.

489
00:46:44.658 -- 00:46:47.700

490
00:46:47.700 -- 00:46:50.700
YaelWhere is the sensitive, intelligent Elon?

491
00:46:50.700 -- 00:46:53.073
You become a monster like the ones you paint,

492
00:46:53.910 -- 00:46:56.610
and that monster swallows up everything good

493
00:46:56.610 -- 00:46:57.843
and is insatiable.

494
00:46:58.920 -- 00:47:03.330
There's no peace, no happiness, no satisfaction.

495
00:47:03.330 -- 00:47:06.450
Like a wide lion roaming the center of town.

496
00:47:06.450 -- 00:47:08.167
It's so difficult to reach you.

497
00:47:11.656 -- 00:47:15.989


498
00:47:23.246 -- 00:47:27.663


499
00:47:33.156 -- 00:47:37.489


500
00:47:52.500 -- 00:47:55.590
At the Breakfast Club, I met a guy called Yaniv.

501
00:47:55.590 -- 00:47:57.600
That same evening as I sat on the motorbike

502
00:47:57.600 -- 00:47:58.980
with my arms around him,

503
00:47:58.980 -- 00:48:01.560
I knew this was the way I should stay.

504
00:48:01.560 -- 00:48:03.330
Long before I knew how to say I love you,

505
00:48:03.330 -- 00:48:05.160
I knew I'd found a home.

506
00:48:05.160 -- 00:48:06.840
Nothing much was said.

507
00:48:06.840 -- 00:48:09.030
We got pregnant, which didn't make me grow up

508
00:48:09.030 -- 00:48:10.890
or stop me from jumping around Santorini

509
00:48:10.890 -- 00:48:13.230
with a little camera and a big belly.

510
00:48:13.230 -- 00:48:15.270
Only when I got to the hospital did I realize

511
00:48:15.270 -- 00:48:17.340
nothing would ever be the same.

512
00:48:17.340 -- 00:48:20.490
My family and all the rest of the world came into my life.

513
00:48:20.490 -- 00:48:24.690
We moved uptown. I got a clothes dryer and two Sphinx cats.

514
00:48:24.690 -- 00:48:26.100
When Emil was born, I realized

515
00:48:26.100 -- 00:48:27.630
that life had just begun.

516
00:48:27.630 -- 00:48:30.840
Anything prior was a mere practice exercise.

517
00:48:30.840 -- 00:48:33.840
If I'd been fearful before, I was now double so.

518
00:48:33.840 -- 00:48:36.270
But all is well and life finally stopped

519
00:48:36.270 -- 00:48:39.570
being an exhibition concept or a good photo in the album,

520
00:48:39.570 -- 00:48:41.790
because although life is like a movie,

521
00:48:41.790 -- 00:48:44.540
a movie has nothing to do with real life.

522
00:48:44.540 -- 00:48:48.123
(gentle cacophonous music)

523
00:49:15.659 -- 00:49:20.076
(gentle cacophonous music continues)

524
00:49:26.211 -- 00:49:30.628


525
00:49:50.292 -- 00:49:53.239


526
00:49:53.239 -- 00:49:55.894


527
00:49:55.894 -- 00:50:00.227


528
00:50:01.246 -- 00:50:05.663


529
00:50:34.228 -- 00:50:38.645


530
00:50:55.554 -- 00:50:57.420
YaelKathy Barr, a distinct curator

531
00:50:57.420 -- 00:50:59.100
came into your life.

532
00:50:59.100 -- 00:51:02.100
She saw your paintings exactly the way you meant them to be.

533
00:51:03.330 -- 00:51:06.000
You began to work together on an exhibition.

534
00:51:06.000 -- 00:51:08.313
Family and friends were invited to a preview.

535
00:51:09.239 -- 00:51:13.656


536
00:51:33.911 -- 00:51:38.328


537
00:51:51.373 -- 00:51:55.623


538
00:52:18.008 -- 00:52:21.086


539
00:52:21.086 -- 00:52:24.171

540
00:52:24.171 -- 00:52:25.638


541
00:52:25.638 -- 00:52:26.971
(Yael laughing)

542
00:52:26.971 -- 00:52:31.304

543
00:52:35.408 -- 00:52:38.550


544
00:52:38.550 -- 00:52:39.550
-Hi, Eilon.

545
00:52:43.025 -- 00:52:47.525


546
00:52:48.965 -- 00:52:53.215


547
00:52:58.242 -- 00:53:02.659


548
00:53:04.389 -- 00:53:05.792


549
00:53:05.792 -- 00:53:10.209


550
00:53:14.610 -- 00:53:19.110


551
00:53:26.123 -- 00:53:30.136


552
00:53:30.136 -- 00:53:34.636


553
00:53:48.934 -- 00:53:53.351


554
00:54:01.099 -- 00:54:05.682


555
00:54:17.040 -- 00:54:19.980
YaelThe feeling of disorientation I wake up with

556
00:54:19.980 -- 00:54:21.600
is just the opening score

557
00:54:21.600 -- 00:54:24.750
of the play in which I'm the last witness to a full life

558
00:54:24.750 -- 00:54:25.713
that nobody knew.

559
00:54:26.760 -- 00:54:27.783
My own life.

560
00:54:29.250 -- 00:54:31.770
Sometimes I feel like that old man who died

561
00:54:31.770 -- 00:54:34.200
a moment before his belongings are distressed

562
00:54:34.200 -- 00:54:35.400
and thrown out in a way

563
00:54:35.400 -- 00:54:37.500
that they can never be put together again.

564
00:54:38.340 -- 00:54:41.250
I keep repeating to myself that a new life

565
00:54:41.250 -- 00:54:43.590
is a continuation of the old,

566
00:54:43.590 -- 00:54:47.340
just like children are continuations of their parents,

567
00:54:47.340 -- 00:54:48.480
and that there is a choice,

568
00:54:48.480 -- 00:54:50.793
whether it's continuing or making change,

569
00:54:51.960 -- 00:54:55.890
but what has been achieved by hard work wouldn't be lost.

570
00:54:55.890 -- 00:54:57.543
That's the best thing to believe.

571
00:54:59.070 -- 00:55:02.763
So here in the movie, or maybe here, it just begins.

572
00:55:03.840 -- 00:55:07.713
In fact, every moment in life has a beginning and an end.

573
00:55:08.700 -- 00:55:11.430
And although our brain is what we are,

574
00:55:11.430 -- 00:55:12.873
we are also our heart.

575
00:55:13.800 -- 00:55:17.430
For you and for me, the only way to say something genuine

576
00:55:17.430 -- 00:55:18.783
is through emotions.

577
00:55:20.437 -- 00:55:23.520
(light guitar music)

578
00:55:30.493 -- 00:55:33.260
♪ It's nobody's business ♪

579
00:55:33.260 -- 00:55:35.472
♪ Nobody's business ♪

580
00:55:35.472 -- 00:55:39.085
♪ Nobody's business but mine ♪

581
00:55:39.085 -- 00:55:41.543
♪ If Dominic (indistinct) got Dominic Holmes ♪

582
00:55:41.543 -- 00:55:43.660
♪ Nobody's business but his own ♪

583
00:55:43.660 -- 00:55:47.879
♪ Nobody's business but mine ♪

584
00:55:47.879 -- 00:55:50.460
♪ Say (indistinct) she go, prop to feel ♪

585
00:55:50.460 -- 00:55:52.285
♪ Buy the fastest automobile ♪

586
00:55:52.285 -- 00:55:56.565
♪ Nobody's business but mine ♪

587
00:55:56.565 -- 00:55:59.017
♪ It's nobody's business ♪

588
00:55:59.017 -- 00:56:01.320
♪ Nobody's business ♪

589
00:56:01.320 -- 00:56:05.614
♪ Nobody's business but mine ♪

590
00:56:05.614 -- 00:56:09.614
(light guitar music continues)

591
00:56:15.375 -- 00:56:18.042
(bright music)